What Seth has been up to

It occurred to me recently that +Seth hasn't made an appearance on my blog in a while (though he showed up on my old blog all the time), and that is a TRAVESTY. In case you were thinking he must be up to nothing, let me disabuse you of that notion:

1. Not too long ago Seth and I went to Red Robin together, and as we waited for our food Seth spilled some water.



Just a little bit. Nothing embarrassing. He didn't want to wet his own napkin cleaning it up, so he leaned over to the recently vacated table next to us to help himself to one of THEIR napkins. (He swears he was going for an unused one, but he has no proof.) Right before he could make the grab, though, the waiter popped up from around a corner and laid his eyes on Seth Grigg, scavenging.



But DON'T YOU WORRY. Seth is smooth.

He pulled himself out of his giant lean and swerved back around to his own table. He picked up the first thing his eyes fell on, which happened to be my water bottle (it accompanies me everywhere), and casually took a sip.



SO casually.

Here's what the waiter said to him:

 "Can I get you anything, sir?"

Here's what Seth said to the waiter:



"Uh, yeah. Napkins."

I hope this story pops up when professional contacts google him. They will be impressed with his recovery. You want to have this guy on your team.

2. Seth just told me a story about Rusty the Red Panda who escaped from the National Zoo and then was saved by an explosive outpouring of concerned Twitterers.

3. I mentioned to Seth that I was going to write a blog post about him to give him the chance to say what he wants to say to the internet, and here's what he wants to say: "Absolutely not. I forbid it."

4. Seth has been analyzing policy. His title is Policy Analyst, which--if you asked someone what his job was and he said Policy Analyst, would that mean anything to you? NOPE! So we like to throw that title around as if it really does mean something.

Examples:

"Which one of us is the Policy Analyst in this family??"
"Did you tell her you are a Policy Analyst?"
"That guy only WISHES he could be a Policy Analyst."

You get the idea.

So you see, Seth has a rich, full life and he has been up to many things. Please consider yourself up to speed.

Here's what Jonah yelled at me (unconvincingly) through his sobs as we aborted our morning walk:

"I'M HAPPY!"

Poor Jonah

Here's a conversation I have with +Jonah frequently:

Him: I'm hungry.
Me: Okay, what do you want to eat?
Him: I'm hungry.
Me: Do you want an apple?
Him: No, I'm hungry!
Me: Do you want a cheese stick?
Him: (starting to cry a little) No, I'm hungry!!
Me: Do you want a granola bar?
Him: (sobbing) NO, I'M HUNGRY!!

I have a feeling the only correct answer is "fruit snacks" or "chocolate," but come on. What does he think hungry means?

The brothers Grigg, on a sad day.

I KNOW what he thinks "body" means, but that is not mentionable on this blog. Lets just say it gave a whole new, weird meaning to the family home evening lesson "I can take care of my body."

Daily dose of pathetic

Today I sat in the library parking lot knowing I'd left my nice water bottle inside but feeling like weeping at the thought of extracting both boys from their car seats, lugging or tugging them both back inside, finding the bottle, hauling everyone back out, and re-strapping them into their seats. I had to call and beg my helpful husband to ride his bike to the library on his lunch break and find it for me.

Bah.

Culture gap

When I read this 

and this

about THIS woman,

I have just one question:

Her?

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THIS BOOK I READ!

The guy loved the girl and the girl loved the guy. But the thing is, THEY DIDN'T KNOW THEY LOVED EACH OTHER! The girl thought her sister was in love with the guy! So out of loyalty she told him she only cared for him as a friend! And then he thought she didn't love him! And then she thought he was just a flirt! Because a jealous girl told her so! But they were really in love THE WHOLE TIME! And then she got kidnapped! And then! There was a duel! But then... they confessed their love. And it was so romantic. And the sister was okay with it. And they both turned out to be secretly rich.

But seriously. I loved the book. Is that okay? Sorry I just ruined the plot. But at least you don't know what book it was.

I feel it needs to be said

that my mother removed her shoes to tour an open house today and then left the house without retrieving them. She didn't notice they were missing until we had driven 20 miles away.